Stirring the pot
Jul. 21st, 2008 02:17 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
kitchen_kinkThis post has caused quite a stir; in fact, I discovered today that someone on my friends list linked to a comment thread within it in a negative fashion. This annoys me, but it also makes me want to continue the discussion.
I believe that the comment thread in question actually opens up a lot of good dialogue about these issues, and gets me closer to what I was trying to say in the first place. What I am especially interested in pointing out from this thread, though, is my last comment in it, which I think sums up a lot about how and why I write here, and why I often post protected rather than letting this be a completely public forum:
A lot of the initial post, so you know, was written in the heat of the moment - on purpose; I wanted to get my feelings out on the page - and wasn't really meant to be a coherent political statement. If anything, it was exposing some of the feelings I'm ashamed of at times: the mirror work of my own intolerance. I assembled a pastiche of my experiences [the night of July 4th] in order to build up to a larger emotional point about how I feel about the way the overculture operates to try and keep us compliant and stupid. In the process I know I come off sounding judgmental and intolerant, but at times it's important to me to get those things out, acknowledge and (partly thanks to [![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
hahathor]) examine those feelings.
It's part of my work to figure out how to walk the line as a freak in this world without becoming self-righteous and intolerant, without removing myself completely from the rest of the world. Part of my reaction was my own fear that I'm getting farther and farther from being able to enjoy time with people not in my social circle; that I'm getting so outside the mainstream that I feel like a space alien most of the time.
I've been doing a lot of work lately on being more permeable. Unfortunately, I've always been overly sensitive, and so I tend to swing between shielding too much and letting too much in. My goal is ultimately to have boundaries like a cell membrane: permeable to exactly the right things; decisively closed to those things that would harm me.
[T]here is, in fact, a majority culture - the image of the American dream sold to us by the media and the government. Each person decides to what degree he or she is going to buy into that culture. And my observation, from my experience, is that the more someone blindly buys into it, the less I can relate to them. And the less someone forges his or her own path, the more likely (I observe) that person is to be anything from blandly complacent to vaguely dissatisfied to seethingly repressed...
I feel more and more that we're living under a quasi-fascist regime, and it is the majority that allows things like that to happen in ostensibly free societies. I don't judge...anyone for being straight or monogamous or having a corporate job or even driving an SUV. But yes, I do judge people for blindly [emphasis added] going along with a status quo that is repressive, not just of sexuality, but of individuality, and of dissent.
I agree...that every individual deserves a chance to prove him or herself. But I think it always behooves one to remember that a person is always smarter than "the people." What I saw on the night of the 4th was not each person's hopes and dreams and no doubt highly variant levels of self-awareness. I saw mob behavior and the police control that goes along with it. And that, I think legitimately, scares me.
My apologies, in the meantime, to those who were so triggered by my use of the word "mundane," even though in the original post, I used it only to refer to mainstream friends of mine whom I like a lot. The subsequent ranting was more about mob mentality and government control (which I think go hand in hand), weird concepts of patriotism, and the lack of self-awareness and anger that I see around me.
I continue to be open to discussion.
I believe that the comment thread in question actually opens up a lot of good dialogue about these issues, and gets me closer to what I was trying to say in the first place. What I am especially interested in pointing out from this thread, though, is my last comment in it, which I think sums up a lot about how and why I write here, and why I often post protected rather than letting this be a completely public forum:
A lot of the initial post, so you know, was written in the heat of the moment - on purpose; I wanted to get my feelings out on the page - and wasn't really meant to be a coherent political statement. If anything, it was exposing some of the feelings I'm ashamed of at times: the mirror work of my own intolerance. I assembled a pastiche of my experiences [the night of July 4th] in order to build up to a larger emotional point about how I feel about the way the overculture operates to try and keep us compliant and stupid. In the process I know I come off sounding judgmental and intolerant, but at times it's important to me to get those things out, acknowledge and (partly thanks to [
hahathor]) examine those feelings.It's part of my work to figure out how to walk the line as a freak in this world without becoming self-righteous and intolerant, without removing myself completely from the rest of the world. Part of my reaction was my own fear that I'm getting farther and farther from being able to enjoy time with people not in my social circle; that I'm getting so outside the mainstream that I feel like a space alien most of the time.
I've been doing a lot of work lately on being more permeable. Unfortunately, I've always been overly sensitive, and so I tend to swing between shielding too much and letting too much in. My goal is ultimately to have boundaries like a cell membrane: permeable to exactly the right things; decisively closed to those things that would harm me.
[T]here is, in fact, a majority culture - the image of the American dream sold to us by the media and the government. Each person decides to what degree he or she is going to buy into that culture. And my observation, from my experience, is that the more someone blindly buys into it, the less I can relate to them. And the less someone forges his or her own path, the more likely (I observe) that person is to be anything from blandly complacent to vaguely dissatisfied to seethingly repressed...
I feel more and more that we're living under a quasi-fascist regime, and it is the majority that allows things like that to happen in ostensibly free societies. I don't judge...anyone for being straight or monogamous or having a corporate job or even driving an SUV. But yes, I do judge people for blindly [emphasis added] going along with a status quo that is repressive, not just of sexuality, but of individuality, and of dissent.
I agree...that every individual deserves a chance to prove him or herself. But I think it always behooves one to remember that a person is always smarter than "the people." What I saw on the night of the 4th was not each person's hopes and dreams and no doubt highly variant levels of self-awareness. I saw mob behavior and the police control that goes along with it. And that, I think legitimately, scares me.
My apologies, in the meantime, to those who were so triggered by my use of the word "mundane," even though in the original post, I used it only to refer to mainstream friends of mine whom I like a lot. The subsequent ranting was more about mob mentality and government control (which I think go hand in hand), weird concepts of patriotism, and the lack of self-awareness and anger that I see around me.
I continue to be open to discussion.
